I didn’t start my journey with a coach, a meal plan, or some perfect system.
I started it completely lost.
I weighed 165kg.
I was unfit, depressed, smoking daily, drinking heavily on weekends,
eating whatever was convenient, and constantly quitting on myself.
For the first six months, I didn’t even know what I was doing.
I just turned up to the gym and did aimless cardio — 1–2 hours a night on the treadmill, bike, or elliptical, five days a week.
No structure. No nutrition. No plan. I was still drinking, still smoking… just grinding away because I didn’t know what else to do.
The first trainer I ever hired took my money and disappeared.
No program. No guidance. No follow-up.
Just gone.
And honestly, that was the moment I realised: No one was coming to save me.
So I never took another coach again — not until years later when I fought professionally in Muay Thai.
Everything up to that point… I learned the hard way.
I failed every diet.
I tried every free program, every app, every workout split.
I learned what I liked, what I hated, what actually worked, and what was just bullshit.
My transformation was built on one thing:
Autonomy.
Taking responsibility for my actions.
No one to blame for quitting.
No-one to lie to.
Just me, my conscience, and the standards I was willing to build.
I didn’t start with motivation.
I started with goals that terrified me:
Run for 1 minute
Run for 5 minutes
Run 5K
Run a half marathon
Run a marathon
Show up to my first training session
Spar
Have a professional Muay Thai fight.
Each goal felt impossible because each one meant stepping into a new identity
one I didn’t yet believe I deserved.
But eventually… the identity started changing.
When I started thinking of myself as a runner, I didn’t want to smoke as much.
When I started training Muay Thai, I didn’t want to get wasted every Saturday.
When I pictured myself performing in a ring, I wanted to fuel better.
When I saw glimpses of the man I could become…
I started acting like him.
Identity came first.
Habits followed.
Motivation caught up later.
Since then, I’ve:
Lost 85kg and kept it off for years
Run marathons
Fought professional Muay Thai in Thailand
Competed in HYROX
Built a life around resilience, health, and autonomy
Now I help men do the same — without needing a coach forever
But here’s the paradox:
Even though I transformed without a coach, I don’t think that’s the best way for most men.
The truth is, I only did it alone because I had no choice.
The first coach I ever trusted took my money and vanished.
No program, no follow-up, no support — nothing.
It left me feeling stupid, embarrassed, and completely on my own.
And that experience shaped me.
It made me promise myself that no man should be left to figure this out the hard way like I did.
No one should feel confused, ashamed, or taken advantage of by someone who’s supposed to help them.
I became a coach to right that wrong.
To be the opposite of the coach who disappeared.
To be the guide I desperately needed back then.
To help men build the skills, confidence, and identity I had to earn through years of trial and error.
Yes, I did it alone — but you don’t have to.
I’ve already lived every mistake, tried every bad diet, failed every approach, and pushed through every uncomfortable stage of change.
I’ve been there.
I’ve done it.
I understand it.
And now I help men shortcut the pain, avoid the years of wasted effort, and build their transformation with clarity, support, and autonomy — not dependency or shame.